Thursday, October 04, 2007

Hi, I'm Nadine Baggott

“Hi, I’m Nadine Baggott celebrity beauty editor for such sterling publications as ‘Hello Magazine' and 'The Daily Mail' and regular guest on BBC ONE’s ‘Vanessa’ and I’d like to try to convince you that I’ve discovered a new revolution in women’s cosmetics but in reality I’ve just read that back of the box and fixated on one ingredient that just about everyone else knows about. Their called ‘Pantypapitudes’ and I think they’re the next big thing, bigger even than the other big things like ‘Nutrisse’, ‘Pro-MadeUp-Sium’ and ‘Make-Skin-Good-Smooth-rotention B’. You can tell I like this new product because I use heaps of it, 647grams a day to be precise. Can you see my flawless, waxy, doll-like skin? Can you see how it’s made my eyes sink into the middle of my witches shoe-face? You too can have this marvellous effect and have a face that looks like it caught fire and someone put it out with a spade by simply being gullible and believing what I tell you. Believe in me and you too can look like the beast from that ‘Beauty & the Beast’ TV show. Go on, you’re worth it. Or you can go buy Nivea’s new product that has 15% more air in it.”

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